Just Happy

Last night Ellinor let me rock her to sleep - all the way, without protest. It was amazing. I do love how easy she goes to bed these days, but I miss her needing me more. Ha, it's bittersweet to watch her grow and become more independent. As I was rocking her I couldn't believe how big she is. I remember holding her in the nursing room back when she was in the hospital nursery for those 9 days. She was was so tiny I could fit her right under my chin and just hold her for ever. Now she takes up my entire upper body, and that's when she's curled up. :) I won't lie, the tears flowed endlessly for awhile. I forget to slow down and truly treasure her every day. We get caught up in just making it through most times, but she's already such a little girl. I am grateful for her spirit in my life. I am in awe that Heavenly Father has entrusted her to me. And I am going to miss the little baby Ellinor that grew so fast. But I am amazed at how wonderful she is - even after she throws a complete meltdown tantrum in Payless. ;)

I am excited for this new little baby, more so every day. I find that with this pregnancy it has taken longer to impact us because our lives are completely focused on Ellinor. But as the time goes by (14 weeks today!) it registers fully that our next little spirit is soon to join us. I can only imagine how happy we will be to have him/her here.

Over the weekend we were blessed to watch General Conference. The older I get the more I appreciate this great opportunity to hear from President Monson and our other leaders. They are undeniably called of God and I naturally love them to pieces. I do not know how anyone could listen to their words and not feel the same way. Conference always has a way of lifting my spirits and energizing me - spiritually, mentally and even physically. Not to be cliche in any way, but I really do feel so much more optimistic about life. I have felt so incredibly grateful these last few months for my amazing life. I recognize every day how extremely blessed I am. And conference always highlights blessings that I sometimes forget to recognize. It is overwhelming to try to thank my Heavenly Father for all that He does for me. My goal is try to live in such a way that He knows how grateful I am. I can try a little (or a lot, if I really think about it) harder and do a little more for Him each day. As Elder Holland asked, "do I love Him?" Of course I do. But do I show it enough in my every day choices? I hope to answer yes soon enough.

On a lighter note, my birthday is coming up. :) For some reason turning 25 has been difficult on me. I feel old. Haha. I know, I know. 25 is not old. But, Bry and I are celebrating 5 years of marriage this Dec, we have a 19 month old daughter and a new baby on the way. I just feel old. Or should I say, 'established.' LOL. This will be a great birthday as I get to spend the day with my cute little family. And I will be over these doldrums in 2 seconds. Excited for what this next year will bring!